Areas of Expertise
Dating and relationships are HARD and many of us need support. We work with couples to reduce conflict and deepen connection and with individuals looking for help in a difficult relationship or in the dating process.
Together, we will work on:
Identifying the thoughts and feelings that may be driving how you behave in relationships
Understanding how certain behaviors may be helping you cope but ultimately leading to disconnection
Learning to tolerate and manage difficult emotions more effectively in your relationships
Learning to share emotions with partners in ways that truly deepen connection
Understanding how prior experiences may have shaped your thoughts, feelings and behaviors in relationships
Stress & Anxiety
If you're struggling with stress and anxiety, you are in good company. There is so much to manage in modern life, it's no wonder we worry. The trick is to allow worry and stress to be present without allowing them to take over.
Together, we'll work towards that by working on:
Learning to observe your emotions without judgment so you can learn from them without feeling consumed by them
Using mindfulness to identify worry without getting overwhelmed by it
Identifying activities that leave you feeling more fulfilled and less stressed and finding ways to incorporate them into your life
Transitions in life can be really tricky. You might be a recent college grad feeling overwhelmed as you launch into adulthood, or a newly empty nester finding it difficult to adjust to daily life without the kids. Wherever you are, therapy can be helpful in finding your way forward.
We will work on:
Focusing your energies for this next chapter by getting clear on what matters most to you.
Making space for emotions related to the gains and losses that come with this transition so you can move through them.
Learning to relate to the anxieties that naturally come with transitions in ways that give them space without letting them run the show.
Approach to Therapy
In therapy, we focus on providing proven treatments in an approachable and welcoming space. We primarily use Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT for short), Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT for short), and Integrative Behavioral Couple Therapy (IBCT for short). All three models are backed by years of scientific research and, most importantly...they work!
ACT is based on two main principles: Acceptance of our experience and Commitment to our values. Using ACT, we’ll work together to identify what matters most to you in life so you can identify the paths along your journey that will lead to more fulfillment. Next, we’ll work on understanding the thoughts and feelings that sometimes make it hard to choose these paths: Ever canceled plans because you felt nervous about meeting someone new even though relationships are important to you? Or zoned out to TV rather than going on a walk even though you feel best when you’re in nature? Us too! These types of choices are so common because as humans we love to avoid uncomfortable feelings. Once we understand this, we’ll work together to bring more fulfillment into your life by making space for some of these uncomfortable thoughts and feelings without letting them control you.
EFT is based on Attachment Theory, which is all about our core need for connection with others. Using EFT, we'll work to understand the difficult feelings that come up in your relationship and how they may lead to behaviors that actually keep you more disconnected in the long run: Ever gotten angry and critical when you actually needed more closeness? Or felt unaccepted by someone and withdrawn from them in order to protect yourself? These behaviors are SO common and make a lot of emotional sense, but unfortunately, they send a threatening message to the other person, which makes the closeness we need more difficult to get. When this happens over and over again, we get stuck in patterns that can leave us feeling trapped. In EFT, we work to understand these cycles so that we can reach for others in new ways that encourage closeness.
IBCT is a behavioral approach to couples therapy that focuses on the emotional underpinnings of a couple's distressing dynamics and works to balance BOTH the need for acceptance and change in the relationship. Sometimes we get so focused on what needs to change in our relationship that we end up sending our partner a threatening message that they need to be different, which actually makes it much harder for them to meet our needs. IBCT offers a unique approach to finding the emotion running under our challenges and creating change while also promoting the acceptance we all need.